Let’s Turn this Bus Around!

16 Mar

If you have been reading my  blog since the beginning, or, you know me in person, you might know by now, that I am a very sensitive and emotional person. I can read others emotions without them saying anything. I can read situations and tread lightly if I feel it requires it, or I can bring a person out of their shell. Co-op students that come to my bakery that are shy and withdrawn, are usually more outspoken by the time they are finished!

With this being said, I need to explain why this is. Everyone has a specific human dynamic. There can be 5 different variations of human dynamics, mine is Emotional Physical. In short, I feel everything! And, conversation, verbalizing and writing out my emotions helps me articulate and realize what I think and feel is true, without knowing that it was true or, even knowing that the words were going to pour out of me. My emotional system and body is in constant interaction. So, if you read something that I have written, and it seems like my world is crumbling all around me, please keep in mind my specific human dynamic, this is why it comes out so raw and deep cutting. I feel everything and when it is emotional pain, it goes down to my core.

This is why, I need to be in constant contact with my inner self. I need to calm myself down and get rid of the tension that has collected, mostly in my shoulders and back. I have given in to Yoga! I went out and bought a mat the other day. I decided, you know what?, instead of lugging these emotions around and having them develop into stress, I am going to get rid of all this unwanted luggage and find myself again under it all. My husband and kids are super supportive with this, my oldest son has even done some yoga with me lately! It really works.

I am turning this bus around! Instead of getting buried deeper and deeper, I will climb out and find a state of self that knows truths when I hear them. This way I cannot be hurt by others hurtful comments.

I have come to really love the store in my city called Calm’n’Scents. I just relax walking into this store! I have bought some colour baths, and some personal scent sticks to smell periodically. Having a bath with some epsom salts, baby oil and colour bath can really make a person relaxed! I felt exquisite afterwards!

I will not let other peoples negativity control my emotions any longer. There will always be nay sayers and people that judge harshly, but they wont bother me! I cannot always be this way, I am human after all, but I can make it have less of an effect on me. My world is different from everyone else’s in this world. I can see through my eyes, I need to try to see through other’s eyes as well. Not everyone does this, and it is a hard thing to train yourself to do if you don’t have it naturally, but there is nothing to lose! As long as I don’t get caught up in living someone else’s emotions, its all good!

I might sound like I am all over the place with this subject, but that is inside my head. Lots of thoughts, and thoughts of different outcomes and different emotions! It never stops!

I think that we as a whole, a city, a society, a country, a continent, a world, need to get rid of all our negativity. Let go. Find out why we do what we do with our anger, our hatred, our sadness… it all stems from 2 basic emotions, fear or joy. Figure out why. A very smart and intuitive woman (Kathy) told me this, and I have had it in my mind ever since. When I feel anger, I instantly think, Why? It’s always fear! Then, I think on that, and my anger goes away and I can work through it.

This will be very hard work, to keep up with keeping myself emotionally fit, which helps with the physical fitness as well. My body holds onto stress and it makes it hard to lose any weight. I am changing this! I will help myself, which helps everyone around me, my husband and my kids. Here I go….. on to a place that is new!

Wish me luck! Or better yet, come with me!

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