I’m A Lover, Not a Fighter!

2 Jul

Having no preparation in schooling or otherwise in business has left me out of the loop with all sorts of things business related. When I first started Bake Me a Cake, I had no intention of it actually leaving my home and becoming what it is today. My real intention was to be able to make enough money to stay at home with my children, but that did not happen. I have no regrets about how the business went and is still going today. Going from my home and making little cakes for people that I know, to having my kitchen over run with cake pans and such, to eventually getting my own bakery with a staff and everything!  On the business side of things, I would have done things alot differently. Business is very cut-throat. I. am. not. I am a lover, I love to make people happy and bring smiles to faces. To do something for people to make them feel good, is my purpose in life.Mean People Suck I don’t like conflict, however I will fight for what I believe is right and I will speak on an injustice if I see it. It makes me feel terrible when people say things hurtful to others on purpose, and what is worse is if they mean it. I am slowly becoming a hippie! And…., I like it! I get upset when my kids are always whining and unhappy with what they have and I try to teach them to appreciate what they do have instead of dwelling on the negative…..but, five and seven year olds do not think that way, which makes me think about how they really got to be that way. My husband and I have not raised our kids to always want more, but they do.

Have you ever felt physically ill because of an emotion? My bets are that you have. I feel this all of the time. I really despise the way that others have such control of my mental and physical happiness. My happiness should be up to me, but its not. There are all sorts of outside factors which determines my happiness….. most of which tend to come from the business side of my life. They are seperate, my life and my business life. Or I try as hard as I can to make it seperate. For instance, I have stopped my family from buying Christmas or Birthday gifts that have anything to do with my work. If I like a cupcake ornament, please let me buy it myself. My argument with this is that I am not my business, I represent my business and it is a passion of mine, but I am not 100% all cupcakes all the time. I am more than that. Would you buy a retail worker a cash register? Or, a person who works in a grocery store, groceries? I feel the same about all of that! Okay, venting….check! Ha Ha!

The whole purpose of this post is to say that business is hard, and people can be mean and nasty in business, and I don’t know how to handle negativity. I see it and hear it more often than I ever had in my whole life. I love what I do, I love who I do it with. I have an awesome staff who all gets along. They are truly all genuine and nice people.sabotage It is when people try t0 sabotage my business or me. It is so easy to do nowadays because of the internet. There does not have to be any credibility to what anyone says about anyone else, and it is spread out there for the whole world to see. This is the harshest form of bullying that there is. Taking freedom of speech to a whole different level. What grinds my gears is that people who have a legitimate problem with something and care usually go right to the source to fix a problem or solve a specific issue. I have no tolerance for people who just spread the bad word. Chances are that they have a very selfish agenda, or have no qualms about hurting others.

I get really weighted down with every day things for the business. Bills, payroll, emails, phone calls from people who just want money, keeping up on the bookkeeping (which I do myself) and making sure that all my staff is on point with everything every week. This is why I do all of the donations and good things for my community. It takes some of the weight off, it lightens me and makes me feel better about all of the stress. It all comes down to making people happy, and the fact that I can do it, makes me even lighter. I have already donated to more than 15 fundraising events, and I donate twice weekly to the Inn of the Good Shepard in my community. There will be a time when I have to not say yes to everyone who walks in the door. Number one, it’s not good for the business to donate everything, number two, I will be easily taken advantage of. This petrifies me. I do not want to be taken advantage of at all. It has happened and it will happen again, but, I get smarter with every day!

For those of you who are thinking of starting a business…. do it! It is hard work, it takes alot of passion for what you do, but it is worth it in the end. And, if you don’t try it, you might regret it in the future. Be strong. Stay strong.

I look back at who I was before I opened the business. I was a cute, non threatening and naive person, with still, the need to help and make people happy. I liked myself okay. But I look at who I am now. My  eyes are wider to take in everything that I see, I decipher more of what I see and I am willing to take advantage of every opportunity to learn from others. I am still cute! Ha Ha! And, I look non-threatening….moo ha ha! But I am not as naive as I once was. This makes me stronger and it makes me like myself even more. I have strong ideals and I voice them if needed. I stand up loud and strong for people I believe in, including myself.

I am a great friend, to those who I know will not hurt me, or take advantage of me and will show me the same respect I give them.

I am a lover, I am not a fighter.

I am grateful for all that I have been given. I love to share what I have. I want to help people and to get a hug in return. If I could live on hugs/snuggles/kisses, then I would!

We need to love everyone like they are our family. We are, in essence, all family. We inhabit this great planet of ours together. Why fight, why get angry?

See….. I told you I was becoming a hippie!     PEACEhippie



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